Forgive me
by Putzie
Summary: Felicity after her servers blew up...
1. Chapter 1

After the servers blew up Felicity felt like she failed all together, she tried not to cry and bit her lip as the mocking words of the clock king played over in her head.

She couldn't help it as the weight of everything came crashing down on her, she felt so alone for the last few days but tonight was the last straw to that turmoil she felt inside and the worst was the that the clock king bested her and she felt humiliated.

The sob that came out of her mouth and the tears running down her face were evidence of the turmoil she had been feeling for days.

_Why John, why did I fail this time...sshh, shhh... Felicity you didn't fail while hugging her and trying to clam her down. "Felicity it's not your fault he said. –But I feel like it is my fault Dig, the one thing I am suppose to be good and it blows up in my face._

"Hey, it's not your fault...ok...he sighed and held her. She is like a little sister to him so seeing her all broken up about this was hurting him.

He had a feeling that some things were bothering her for the last few days but he didn't want to approach her about it so he waited that she opened up to him. He knew Oliver and Sara's getting together was one of those things.

That girl wore her heart on her sleeve when it came to Oliver and it was pretty obvious that she was in love with him but he seems to always over look her; and for that he wanted to really punch Oliver Queen in the face. The guy was a class A jerk ass for treating that wonderful girl like that; he truly didn't deserve her love and loyalty.

_Hey Felicity, come on let's get you cleaned up before those two come back. They said they are going to be here in a few minutes. –"Ok she answered._

So she let go of him, gabbed her bag and was just about to go when she hugged him tighter and whispered..."Thanks Dig, you're the best big brother" and with that she made her way to the restrooms.

While in the restroom Felicity splashed water on her face to clean away the dried tears and mascara. She felt a little bit calm and better, she was grateful to have a friend like John Diggle who was like a big brother to her. I think he understood her better then Oliver and she knew that after this he was going to go into overprotective mode the minute she walked back down there.

_While combing her fingers through her hair she looked in the mirror and said. –You can do this Felicity; no man is worth your tears. If he doesn't want you then so be it because it's not worth the pain your heart feels. So you can do this Smoak, you didn't graduate at the top of your class for nothing. _

With that said Felicity finally locked away that part of her that was in love with Oliver Queen (not Ollie Queen). From now on she was going to keep her distance from him and keep it professional. No more letting her eyes follow him around while his training and no more letting him touch her, just no more intimate things with him. There was so much her heart could take so her best option was;

_**Out of sight, out of mind**_

John was just trying to pick up the things from the floor when he heard Oliver and Sara coming in.

While walking down Oliver could smell smoke and he was concerned. He hoped that Felicity was ok because John said something about their systems getting hacked and he heard the explosion.

"Hey Dig where is Felicity? We heard transmissions got intercepted by the clock king. "Felicity's in the restrooms and it seems the clock king got in some how an-

"What Dig is trying to say is that the clock king used the skeleton key to penetrate our system.

"I don't understand Sara answered.

"Well Sara he basically told out system to commit suicide and it did or you could say he told our system to go fuck itself"

To say Oliver and Sara were shocked with her swearing was something? John was just trying not to laugh out loud at their expressions. He tried to cover it with a cough when Oliver gave him a funny look.

Oliver was just trying to move towards her and ask her if she was okay when she side stepped him and walked straight up to Diggle. He stood there looking confused and a little bit hurt because this was the first time that Felicity walked right past him with out a glance. For that matter, she hasn't looked in his direction since she came down.

Dig lifted his head up and asked "Are you okay?

She smiled, squeezed his arm and said "Yes John I am okay.

"_What the hell is going and why is Felicity avoiding me? Just when Oliver was trying to rake his mind and think of why she was acting like this, he saw her smile at Dig and whispered something...Fuck! I want to hit Dig right now...wait what! I'm with Sara, why am I feeling the edge to punch John? And then his conscious mind replied "Because you don't like sharing Felicity with anyone else, remember Barry Allen? You're still thinking of ways to pick an arrow in that kid for taking her attention away from us. Admit it dude, we're crazy in love with her...WHAT! Shut up brain...he answered. _

_Ok this was weird because he was arguing with his brain about Felicity..._

He was just trying to walk up to the both of them when Sara said some thing...

"Do you need any help Felicity asked Sara? –I'm good so go to your family dinner. But this is more important she replied. Felicity wanted to tell them to get lost but she held in her anger and looked at Sara and said "And so is your family"

Sara sighed and turned to Ollie "Can you please come with me? – Oliver turned looked at the back of Felicity's head and answered "I think its best I stay here.

"Please Ollie come with me? –Oliver was lost and just wanted Felicity to turn around and look at him so that he could say no to Sara but what he heard next took the wind out of him.

"_**Just what do you think you can help me with Oliver?**_

With a hurtful expression, Oliver turned around nodded his head at Sara and walked out of the there a painful feeling in his chest. He didn't know how to describe it but it sure felt like his heart was been stabbed a million times.

He didn't know what happened but his IT girl was pulling away from him;

He felt it for days now and since he started seeing Sara, it was like she disappeared from his life. In his mind he kept repeating over and over

_**I'm sorry Felicity; forgive me for crushing both our hearts...**_


	2. Chapter 2

After the Lance family dinner which was probably the most awkward one of his life. Oliver was frustrated and angry, he wanted to hit something or better yet put an arrow through someone. He had a head ache from the way he handled things with Laurel but he knew she needed to hear what he had to say. He was just glad he finally got it off his chest

If he was honest with himself he knew it was a bad idea to come with Sara because the look on Quentin Lance face said it all for him;

"_**He was not welcome into there home"**_

He knew he caused so much damaged with them and he understood were Mr Lance was coming from, but it was because Sara had asked him too so that it would not be an uncomfortable for her. But really deep down inside his heart he knew he did it because he was hurt by Felicity's words for not needing him that he decided to come with Sara.

"_**Just what do you think you can help me with? Oliver"**_

Those words kept playing over and over since their drive to the Lance's house. He couldn't get those words out of his head. In those words Felicity shut him out and just told him that she didn't need him and for him that scared him because his always needed her. He remembered during dinner that somehow the conversation turned to be about Felicity which was surprising.

So Mr Queen asked Quentin, "How's Felicity?

"Who's Felicity? asked Laurel with her wine glass in her hand?

Laurel turned to her father and asked "Dad how do you know Felicity? – Oh I met her at Oliver's building during the time they kidnapped Thea and also she's also Sara's friend he said.

Before anyone could answer a look of recognition came to her face.

"Wait; was she the one that interrupted us at the club? Ollie, "The cute blonde one who was helping you with your internet or router thing?

With a look of surprise Oliver answered "Yes that's her. –I'm surprise you remember her Laurel, she said that she felt like she didn't make a good impression on you. –What! You didn't think I wouldn't recognise a beautiful woman wanting to drag you away for some hot sex.

His eyebrows shot up in anger towards her. "How the hell did you come to that conclusion?

Before it became a full out war, the former Mrs Lance had stirred the conversation away from Felicity and towards her life in Central city and her relationship with Quentin Lance.

Oliver remembers it was during this conversation that Laurel had put two and two together and had figured out what was going on between Sara and Oliver. To say she was angry was just an understatement, she was bloody furious.

That's when he finally told her what he needed to say and walked back into the house.

He was just glad that the dinner was over because he didn't know how much more he could take. Most of his thoughts were occupied by a certain blond, who he was certain he had hurt.

_How am I going to fix this mess? Why do I keep making those same mistakes? I guess I haven't learnt anything at all..._

Sara was just wondering if Ollie was ok because for almost twenty minutes since the drive, he had been really quiet. Well she was not blind, he's been like this since they left the arrow lair and to be honest she thought that it had some thing to do with Felicity. Because this evening proved what she was thinking. She saw how angry he had gotten when Laurel mentioned Felicity and she saw his hands fisted. She never saw him liked this, a side that was by far very territorial.

Felicity was truly an amazing person, she always put others well being before her own. Even with her and Oliver's dark past surrounding them, Felicity always found a way to make them feel like normal people. She didn't question, she didn't ask, she just accepted and embraced them all. She didn't make Sara feel like an outsider when she came on the team even though Sara was kind of bitchy to her the first time.

Felicity's zest for life and her sense of humour brightened up the Arrow team world. She could understand why Oliver was drawn to it. I mean they, Oliver, John, Roy and herself were drawn to her light. Like moths to a flame seeking out the light that could take the darkness away.

She was definitely one of a kind and women like Felicity Smoak were very rare to find.

Since they slept together they never really talked about what their status was, she only knew that they both needed the release and so they both found comfort whenever possible but looking at her sister's face she knew this was not going to end well for them.

"Hey! Ollie a you Okay? –What! Yeah Sara, sorry I'm fine. –No Ollie your not, I can see that it was a bad idea to have brought you to this dinner and I am sorry if Laurel or my family was rude to you.

"No Sara, it's not that, it's just that I have a lot on my mind right now and what happened back there didn't help. I really hope Laurel will be ok and that she gets the help she needs.

"Yeah Ollie, she's my sister and I want what's best for her. I want her to get the help she needs to turn her life around. But we both know that bringing you over was not one of my best moves.

Oliver reached out and squeezed and her and said –_It's ok we'll both be there to help her if she needs us Sara._

Before more could be said between them, they arrived at the foundry. With a lot on both their minds as they walked in they looked up and heard saw John Diggle sitting in the dark.

While pressing certain keys on the keyboard, Dig looked up and asked.

"Did you see Felicity? –No...wait why?

"I went to big belly to get some take out and when I came back she was gone, haven't seen her for hours?

Before Oliver could say something; his phone rang and he took it out of his pocket and signalled to John that it was her.

"_Hey!–Tockman took the bait, the money you had Walter deposit she answered. I'm reading his signal at Starling National..._

_With a confused look Oliver asked "Wait how do you know that?_

_Because I'm here...-What?_

"_Don't move Felicity, we're coming for you..._

"What the fuck was she thinking he shouted? – Oliver where is she asked Dig...

Sara and John were shocked by his action; he never lost it like this before. He was showing the same territorial side again he looked like he was down right furious.

"We have to go now Dig, she's at Starling National...

"What! Damnit Felicity...John answered while waiting for Oliver to suit up.

With an angry look on his face, he turned to Dig and asked "Why would she do this?

"I don't know man but you must be really that blind. I thought she was the one with glasses? But I guess not

"What the hell is that suppose to imply Dig?

"_**It means you better pray that that girl comes back in one piece or you're going to answer to my fist in your face" **_


	3. Chapter 3

I apologies if you have problems reading and following the story. Was in a rush to write and didn't put that appropriate signs to certain sentences. Believe me I can see my mistakes after reading it so thanks for your feed back.


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